early mornings and sore muscles

So a week and a half into the new job means...

Getting up at 5AM is becoming a normal-- albeit not yet comfortable-- part of life.

Figuring out two work schedules with one car. (Good thing our exchange student can now ride his motorcycle to school!) My boss gave me a key to the office, so that I can check in with security and go to work at 6:15. Problem is, I went to the bathroom one morning and forgot that my keycard wouldn't work until 7:00, so I had to find a way to climb over the receptionist's desk to get back into our office.

Packing lunch and snack again. I confess I didn't miss this part when my husband wasn't working. But now, because his job is so physical, I not only need to pack him a lunch but also a morning and afternoon snack for break time.

Dropping him off and picking him up at work when I need to use the car during the day.

Having him home for more of the afternoon, because he gets off between 3-4 PM. We like this part of the job.

Doing more laundry, because his clothes get greasy and sweaty from assembling oil valves.

Structuring our lives around his work schedule because it is very taboo to be late. (I was so worried about this that I dreamt that I dreamt that we had overslept-- yes, that means I woke up "twice" thinking he was late to work-- all in the same night!)

Making tentative weekend plans, because he may have to work on Saturday. (There are 3 out-of-town weddings we'd like to attend this month...)

Feeling exhausted throughout the day as we learn to go to bed earlier...

Changes-- yes. But it's been good. We are grateful for this job and the opportunity he has to be part of industrial America.

readjusting to employment

Thanks to all who offered advice for our situation.

Over the last week, my husband has had job interviews with two companies, a call to interview with a third company, and a real honest-to-goodness job offer...

...which he accepted.

Starting tomorrow morning, we'll be readjusting to employment by getting up an hour earlier, so he can get to work by 6:30 AM, where he'll be working on valve assembly for 9 hours a day. This is no desk job-- it's a "pull-out-the-grubby-tennis-shoes, on-your-feet-all-day" kind of job.

While most people will say that you do what you have to do to pay the bills, he decided to accept this job, because it will plug us into a different corner of our community. While we continue entertaining the idea of him going back to school, this job will introduce him to a new realm of ideas, lifestyles, and backgrounds.

But enough glorification of his new warehouse job. It's time for us to start going to bed early.

decisions

Happy one unemployment monthiversary to us.

So one month later, here's a glimpse into the decisions that we're facing. First, some of the non-negotiables:

We just bought a house last summer.

We have a high school exchange student living with us through the beginning of June (and probably for the next two years).

We have already booked tickets to a good friend's wedding over Memorial Day, so he would have to take two days off from work (if he is offered a position).

My sister is getting married the second weekend of July, so we are planning to go help out a week or two ahead of time.

We are planning to host a group of international students for a five-week summer conference immediately following the wedding.

It appears that the university doesn't have classes that he can audit until June.

Our options (in no particular order):

Should my husband wait to see if he's accepted for a temp job that will tide us over until the summer, pays relatively well, allows for flexible hours, but probably does not provide him with any sort of long-term career opportunities?

Or should he take a manual labor job at a reputable company in our city that does not pay as well, demand a more regimented work schedule (9 hours a day, 5-- sometimes 6 days a week), but give him a foot in the door at that company?

Or should we consider relocating for other work opportunities?

Or should he spend more time figuring out a business plan for our summer conference to see if that could become a full-time ministry?

Or should he audit classes at a nearby university to continue exploring the possibility of pursuing higher education in the areas that interest him most?

Or should he consider a combination of any of the above?

Maybe we should both join the circus. :-) What would you do?

buying vs renting

When you're going through unemployment, there's a period of "floundering," when you aren't quite sure what to do with yourself, so you reach out for something-- anything-- that might help restore your sense of normalcy and security.

After my husband got laid off, we went through that-- trying to figure out what kind of work he could do, how we could maintain the income we needed, whether or not to pursue various job opportunities...

At the same time, however we wanted to make sure we didn't jump into something simply to establish a false sense of security. We knew God led us to here. We knew God led my husband to work at this specific company. We knew God allowed him to get laid off. Why? Does God want to direct our paths in a totally different direction? If so, how do we go about figuring that out?

A couple weeks ago, we traveled to Minnesota for my husband's grandfather's funeral. As we drove through the barren corn fields of Iowa, we listened to this song:

But if my life is for rent, and I don't learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
'Cause nothing I have is truly mine

Hmm... What does that mean? Are we "renting" or "buying" right now? We've often talked to our friends about living without regrets-- but what would that look like for us?

I thought back to the week my husband was laid off. We found ourselves unpacking boxes from our move last September. While he worked through numerous boxes of books and collections (that I laid eyes on for the first time ever), he began carrying on an online debate with a group of atheists. That led to a formal blog debate, in which he and one of the atheists posted back and forth for a total of six times.

While I would have avoided that kind of situation, my husband dove in with great relish. He researched his arguments, discussed them with friends, and mulled over it throughout the day. For the first time in our marriage, he entered a zone where I couldn't quite reach him.

I mentioned that observation to him as we began discussing the concept of "buying." If he enjoyed that mental stimulation, that research, that debating so much... what if that was what God designed him to do? What if he were to go back to school for that specific purpose?

He paused before responding with "Huh."

We sank into silence, him processing the new idea and all its implications and me watching his mind at work.

And so, we have begun praying in this direction. If this is what God created my husband to do, then we want to get ready to "buy."

________________________

For those of you who have been asking about his second interview, it seems to have gone well. He has another one tomorrow and has also submitted his resume to a number of other places. All of these are for temporary positions to tide us over until the summer. Thank you for your love and prayers!

seeking re-employment

"The only people who never fail are those who never try." (Ilka Chase)

My husband is the type who is willing to knock on the door of any possible opportunity. Over the last couple weeks, we've discussed everything from looking for another full-time position to starting our own business to going back to school.

The reality is that we have a commitment to host a group of international students this summer for one month. Most full-time positions would not allow anyone to take that much time off, so my husband's been looking for a temporary job to tide us over until the beginning of the summer.

But neither of us expected Temporary Company #1 to turn down his application.

I was washing the dishes when he announced that the low point in his day was when he called Company #1, and the manager informed him that his application had been filled out unsatisfactorily and that he would be barred from applying there again for the next 90 days.

What?! How could it have been that bad?

My husband explained that the online application had included a variety of multiple-choice questions, which required him to say what he would do in various situations that may arise at work-- including employee disagreements. Ah. Maybe that's why my "fix-it-myself-and-help-others-come-to-the-right-conclusion" husband was denied this position.

Even so, the rejection stung.

...which is why I sent him off to job interview #2 this afternoon with a bit of trepidation. I didn't want him to go through that experience again. And yet-- I need to let him try. This is life for those who are seeking re-employment.

I guess we'll see how it goes.

"Right now... I'm good."

I hit a few rough spots yesterday... like when my husband dropped me off for work and when I had to delete his work email from my address book and when my colleague gave me a big hug (I only work once a week, so the last time I saw her was before everything happened).

When people ask me how I'm doing, if I'm not doing well, I usually respond with "OK" before my lip quivers and my eyes well up with tears. But those moments have decreased a bit over the last few days, and the Lord has given us much to be happy about.

...like the fact that we were able to enjoy a breakfast date at Starbucks after we dropped our exchange student off at school this morning, because today is free pastry day! (Thank you, Starbucks!) We even got our drinks for free, because a very kind friend decided to bless us with a gift card.

So instead of responding with "OK," I can smile and answer, "Right now... I'm good."

"a wonder to many"

One of the "luxuries" of unemployment is the feeling that everyday is like a Saturday. In fact, it was difficult for me to remember which day of the week it was, because we spent this first week regrouping-- sleeping in, working on projects that had been on the back burner for too long (such as unpacking the boxes in the garage), and spending time with friends.

A couple days after my husband was laid off, we were doing just that-- we slept in and read the Bible together before getting up for the day. That morning, we read Psalm 71:

"I have become as a wonder to many, but You are my strong refuge." (Psalm 71:7 NKJV)

I wondered what the word "wonder" meant. I wasn't so sure it was a positive term, especially if "You are my strong refuge" immediately followed it. If I were to paraphrase it, it would have sounded a bit like this:

"Everyone is talking about me (behind my back?), but I will seek protection from You."

Not exactly encouraging. So I looked up the words "wonder" and "refuge" in the Strong's Concordance, and this is what I got...

WONDER [4159]: wonder (as a special display of God's power), sign, token (of future event). (Used in Exodus for the plagues against Egypt.)

REFUGE [4268] from rain or storm, from danger of falsehood

Hmm... danger of falsehood? Why falsehood? The more I thought about it, however, the more I realized that my greatest struggle this past week was the fight to believe what is true. When my emotions were hard to control, it was a constant battle to remember Who God is and where we as believers find our true sense of security.

As I told a friend at church today, "God's grace has been so great this week. We are in a good place-- a very hard place, but good. It was just a job-- not our security."

So allow me to try paraphrasing again...

"You have chosen me to be a living demonstration of Your power. You will shield me from the lies of the enemy, because You are the Truth."

Not a bad reason to be talked about.

___________________________

"Let my mouth be filled with Your praise and with Your glory all the day." (Psalm 71:8)